My hair like Jesus wore it, Hallelujah I adore it!

While washing dishes yesterday morning, I was contemplating body acceptance, self-acceptance, self-love, etc. in a particularly hippie-ish fashion. I was thinking about how I used to assume I needed to be “perfect” and have all my shit together in order to be loveable. It’s easy to get stuck in this frame of thought, that you need to be some utopian, ideal human being before you can move forward or start a relationship.

Hold on a minute and consider this… What do you find most beautiful in others? Personally, I am attracted to weirdness. I like eccentricities and flaws. And I’m pretty sure I’m not alone in this. If I am able to love someone BECAUSE of their imperfections, who am I to think someone else cannot love me for those same reasons? While there are certainly situations where it is helpful to spend some time alone, I encourage everyone to accept those little quirks and “insufficiencies” with open arms.

Embrace your “weird” because goddamn, it is beautiful!

Feminist in the Kitchen

Apparently, I have a domestic side. Who knew?!

Feeling especially house-girlfriend-y (though I really prefer the term Chaos Wranger, as coined by J), I decided to whip up a batch of veggie burgers. I must confess, I have been incredibly lazy in the past, opting for store-bought, frozen Franken-Soy patties. Now that I realize how easy it is to put together a homemade version, I don’t think I’ll be going back. Basic veggie burger recipe? Pick a grain, pick a bean or legume, add a veggie or two. Mash, mix, shape and cook! Today’s little buggers consisted of red quinoa, cannellini beans, oat flour and sauteed onion.

Quinoa & Cannellini Bean Patties

  • 1/2 cup quinoa, uncooked
  • 1 (15-ounce) can cannellini beans, drained and rinsed
  • 10g (1 tablespoon) oat flour (I just added regular old-fashioned oats to my food processor and processed to a flour consistency)
  • 1/4 onion, sauteed
  • Spices, to taste. I used garlic powder, cumin and lemon pepper

Cook quinoa. I used a rice cooker. Let cool.

Meanwhile, saute onion in a pan. Add drained and rinsed beans and heat through. Spice as desired. Mash using a potato masher or fork.

Once quinoa and bean mixture have cooled enough to handle, form into 8 balls then flatten each to form a pattie shape. Fry in a pan or bake, until slightly browned on each side.

I love to freeze veggie burgers so I have something to pull out for quick, easy meals. To freeze, place patties on a parchment-lined baking sheet and allow to chill until slightly hardened, about an hour. Place the patties in an air-tight container and freeze.

Servings: 8 Serving Size: 1 pattie Calories: 86 Fat : .6g Carbohydrates: 16.6g Fiber: 3.6g Sugars: 0.5g Protein: 4.5g

I didn’t have any vegan bread lying around, so I mixed up some whole-wheat tortillas from http://bankruptvegan.blogspot.com/2013/05/homemade-flour-tortillas.html They whipped up in a jiffy and the resulting tortillas were soft and flavorful. I didn’t roll them quite thin enough, so they were more like a flatbread than a tortilla, but I actually enjoyed the more bread-like texture. J later used the leftovers to make mini tacos, and he gave me the stamp of approval on this recipe.

Image

I know, I know…I’m a terrible photographer. But these were delicious! Look at that pretty quinoa!

Shine On Benevolent Sun…

Morning people are a conundrum. You know, those chattery, chipper folks who wake up wanting to have a conversation while you stare at their moving mouth, hearing nothing but “wah, wah, wah, waaah, wah,” wondering what day it is and whether or not you could tell them to shut the hell up in  an unoffensive way.

Lately, however, I’m finding a new pleasure in mornings. I’m willing to risk sounding a little cliche by admitting that mornings feel increasingly like fresh, clean beginnings and less like a period of hours to be endured. One thing I’ve especially started to enjoy each morning is a healthy, delicious breakfast. In years past, as I struggled with an eating disorder, I would avoid breakfast, electing to “save” all my calories for the end of the day. What an awful and ridiculous way to live! I would never expect my car to run without fuel and yet I would get sincerely pissed at my body for not continuing to function properly on “x” calories. Perhaps this change of mindset explains some of my new-found love for those A.M. hours.

Banana Flax Steel Cut Oats. Mmm...

Banana Flax Steel Cut Oats. Mmm…

My boyfriend, J, can attest to the fact that I eat a ridiculous amount of oatmeal. I can’t help it! Especially on bitterly cold mornings, such as this, I find so much comfort in this humble grain. (That sentence sounds particularly pretentious, but I’m keeping it anyway. :)) Yesterday I cooked a double batch of steel cut oats in the rice cooker. If you’ve never done this, I highly suggest it. I’ve always had trouble cooking steel cut oats on the stove-top without causing some type of burning or eruption of oatmeal overflow. The rice cooker is a much less hands on approach. Since I already had a batch prepared, I simply put the leftovers in a saucepan with a little almond milk and warmed them on the stove. Add a little cinnamon, mashed banana, a sprinkling of ground flax and a few blueberries and you’re set with a filling and nutrient-packed bowl of deliciousness.

As I move forward with my recovery, I’m making a conscious effort to focus on and appreciate the little moments: Snuggling with J before getting out of bed, that first sip of coffee, the bright sun reflecting off snow-covered ground. And, most certainly, starting the day by nourishing my body. I’m beginning to see food as fuel for a body that has carried me through so much, regardless of my lack of appreciation for what it has endured. This body is mine, and rather than dwell on each flaw, today I am choosing unconditional acceptance.

Your body is just a shell for all that is “you.”

Opening Credits

Setting:

City in Indiana.

Dead of winter: Sunny but frigid.

Late 19th century house living room.

Characters:

Me (Holly): 30-something girl. Loves knee high socks, the sound of the cat crunch-crunch-crunching his food and collecting old things. Dislikes being called ma’am, backseat drivers and skin rashes.

J: Boyfriend. Computer genius, nerd-extraordinaire. He’s one awesome dude.  Likes German chocolate cake, reading comics and plaid PJ pants. Dislikes grapefruit and hugs from strangers.

Hermes: Not your average domestic cat. Loves eating canned pumpkin and playing fetch with rubber bands. Dislikes having his belly sniffed.